Wednesday, August 29, 2012

A Waltz to Remember...or Was I Dreaming?

2:30 am

BOOM! I jump about a foot high in the bed. Another thunderstorm in the middle of the night! Seriously! The room lights up from the next big bolt of lightning. One Mississippi, Two Mississippi, Three Mississippi...BOOM!

I lay there once again eyes WIDE open! 5, 4, 3, 2, 1...just like clockwork. Tap, Tap, Tap on my shoulder.

"Mommy, I heard thummer" and this is just the beginning of my night! My sweet cherub climbs in bed beside me making me the oven roasted turkey to the Darling Husband and Superboy sandwich! And, as usual, they both fall back to sleep...quickly and soundly! Darling Husband on the verge of snoring.

I lay there for what seems like an hour. Thinking. Counting those damn sheep. Thinking again! Reminding myself...I gotta get up earlier than 7:00 am this morning to get the kids to school on time. My inner diva is singing, "Here's my number, So call me maybe" forever stuck in my conscience. I wonder if that is my alter ego just trying to mess with me? Or, maybe it is because that song is WAY overplayed so much that my Superboy knows every word!!!

3:45 am

Finally, I decide to put my wings on and gently rise above the two pieces of Honey Wheat bread surrounding me who are sleeping oh so nicely. I cup my hands under my sweet cherub and scoop him into my arms to move him over to the pillow blanket on the floor that he usually sneaks onto in the middle of the night from his upstairs bungalow.

Wait...where is it? It is usually in the middle of the floor every night. Am I blind? I can't feel it with my feet. Where is a flash of lightning when I need it. This little cherub is getting heavy...Darling Husband still sleeping!

Look for the dog. Dog will be on it!

Ahhh! Over on the side of the bed by the now snoring husband. With my foot, because I have a full sack of Idaho potatoes in my arms, I manage to yank up the heavy pillow blanket, startling the Dog.

What the hell is that? Some "terrible awful" (to quote Minny Jackson) sound coming from my dog. Is he choking? There he goes again. Darling husband finally manages to let out a grown and shuffles around to sit up. Can I get back to counting sheep please?

Flash!! Oh good...I am not blind! One Mississippi, Two Mississippi, Three Mississippi, Four Mississippi, Five Mississippi...BOOM! Storm is getting farther away. Am I just dreaming this? Is this a nightmare?

There he goes again...that sound. Darling Husband is now sitting up and turns on the lamp on the bedside table. "What is that?" he questions as if I am suppose to have all the answers at 3:50 in the morning.

Clearly our Dog is choking! We scramble to get the Pillow Blanket out, unleash the cherub who is threatening to wake and get the Dog out of the room.

There he goes again. What in the world? Did I do some kind of magic trick when I tried to yank the blanket from underneath the dog. Why is he all of a sudden choking after he was snoring in unisom with Darling Husband.

Now in the kitchen, Darling Husband and I are violently awake and both questioning what is going on. Dog can't stop with the horendous noise. It keeps going and going...Loudly! I begin to panic. Am I about to see my dog die? Am I about to see my husband cry over one of the precious yet crazy parts of our little life?

Then all of a sudden Darling Husband shoves his rather large, manly hand down Dog's throat. Did I just see that at 4:15 in the morning? He does it again...nothing. The violent sound continues. Again. Nothing. Dog looks at me with sad eyes. Now I am about to cry. We have a love hate relationship...the Dog and I! Dog now jumps on me as if we are about to do The Waltz. Me...why me?

Mommy Mode kicks in. Bread. Maybe he needs something to eat to get whatever is choking him down? Run to the pantry to grab some Honey Wheat (not much left, will have to go out for lunch tomorrow). I start feeding Dog the bread and he wolfs it (pun intended) down. Two pieces and I get a "STOP" from the drill sargent. We wait a few minutes. Seems as though it worked...proud mama! Ok it worked! Good! Back to the sheep...or inner diva singing!

Clean up bread crumbs and grab a glass of water for myself and there it goes again for what seemed like forever! Poor Dog! What is happening? Water...maybe he needs water? My water that was going to bed with me was swiftly being poured down dogs throat. Nothing...he keeps yelping. What to do?

Darling Husband looks at my hand. Ah damn! I know what he is thinking. "Honey, your hand is smaller than mine." And, before he could even ask, he was opening Dog's jaws and my hand was slowly going down his throat to try to de-clutter (for a lack of better words) whatever was going on down there.

Teeth. All I could feel were teeth. Then I believe I went back to that nightmare for the next few seconds. And, then out! My hand is in one piece yet rather slimmy.

Nothing! The noise is still protruding out of my big stubborn Dog's helpless little soul! I try it again. Teeth. Nightmare. Nothing.

More water. More waltzing. More bread. And, he finally stops.

5:45 am.

I finally head back to bed before the munchkins wake up and leave Darling Husband to monitor the Dog. Ah! Finally sleep!

6:15 am

BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP! Again! What is that? Darling Husband's phone alarm in the bathroom. I need about 30 more can eat breakfast in the car on the way to school.

6:45 am

"So, here's my number...Call me maybe" OMG!! What now? Not that song! Of all songs! It's Darling Husband's clock radio on his bedside table. How many alarm's does this man need? I hit it with my fist. And, surprisingly fall back to sleep thinking I can throw in a no-brainer Lunchable for their lunch...I will make them a good dinner!

7:25 am

"Honey, it's time to get up and get the kids going," says Darling Husband. 7:25! Oh crap! Here we go! And, we are off to do it all over again...cup of java in hand and hopefully an afternoon nap in the near future!

Oh, and fyi, you know that annoying tickle you can get in your throat where you can't stop coughing and you think a peppermint is going to do the trick but it never does? Well, apparently dogs can get them, too!! Until the next Waltz!!

Thursday, August 16, 2012

Summer Bucklet List Completed ...well Almost!!!

What a fantastic summer!! It really could not have been any better!!

Here are a few things from our family summer bucket list, a few we still need to complete and a few we will  continue to do throughout this coming year! This is a compiled list from our entire family (not too hard to figure out which task belonged to which member) and in no particular order!! It got a little creative! Enjoy! We did!

1. Make new friends, but keep the old. We follow this all year round!
2. Plant a garden and actually grow something. This really and truly happened and I was so excited!!!!!
3. Find a way to make Skinny Fried Okra. Whole wheat flour! Okra from my garden :)
4. Make Skinny Pimento Cheese. Some things just need to be all fat! A waisted 20 minutes!
5. Walk around town after dark as a family and see the sights...with a little ice cream!
6. Go on a road trip to a new place! Highly recommend this for every summer, along with a dvd player and lots of books for the ride!
7. Pick fresh blueberries from the tree...and eat a few right out of the palm of your hand!
8. Try to eat all organic!
9. Tell a friend how much your relationship with them means to you!
10. Watch the Olympics and keep track of the Medal Count! Go USA!
11. Learn about a new country! London, of course!
12. Run as a family through sprinklers. Water was so strong it flew one child about 4 feet...giggles from the entire family!
13. Go bowling and wear funky knee socks! Next, midnight bowling...adults only!
14. Draw a Chalk Art family mural on the back porch...and make mommy look extra skinny and beautiful!
15. Take a pottery class for kids and manage not to break anything!
16. See a famous person! Totally happened...someone I had a huge crush on in college! Not so cute now!
17. Organize at least one room in the house...or one drawer!
18. Play putt-putt golf and, in conjunction, realize this could be a new after school activity!!!
19. Clean out the garage. Still has not happened...hint hint Darling Husband!
20. Have a lemonade stand or garage sale and give all the proceeds to charity!
21. Have a water balloon fight!
22. Fly a kite! Each kid had their own kite...each kite got tangled together...each kite then got tangled in the sand dunes...each kite got tangled in the trash!!
23. Make homemade ice cream! Yummy chocolate thanks to Darling Husband!
24. Find a new summer beverage. Fresh Fruit Mint Sangria!
25. Make that Mountain Dew Glow thing on Pinterest! Did not work...need to try again! Any advice?
26. Read a Novel. Does the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy count??
27. Read a chapter book as a family! Not Fifty Shades!
28. Go to Sonic Happy Hour...and NOT get Mozzarella Sticks!
29. Dig for dinosaurs...and find prehistoric worms! Yuck!
30. Pick a date night and act like college kids. Check, check, check!
31. Watch a Sunrise and Sunset. May have a little something to do with the above!
32. Go to a drive-in movie. It rained!
33. Find a new "at home" work-out. I refuse to get babysitters in the summer unless absolutely necessary! Not so successful...had to cut out the pimento cheese but not the Sangria!
34. Build a life size Robot. Not happening!
35. Pet a baby shark. Yep!
36. Go on a kayaking trip/adventure as a that is a work-out!
37. Go oyster diving...waiting until the fall to do this!
38. Go on a family fishing trip and everyone catch something! I had the smallest catch...a baby snapper! We threw it back to it's mommy!
39. Have a family camp out...this occurred in our den...enough said!
40. Go and get inspired at Duh and Ikea! Now my brain is on overdrive!
41. Try some new restaurants! Still have not checked off The Biscuit King, Old 27 Grill, Tru Midtown, the new Gambino's or the new burger joint at The Wharf! Need to do ferris wheel, too!
42. Take the kids to eat at a nice white table cloth restaurant...this occurred several times and with success...thanks to Angry Birds and Stack the States!
43. Take the kids to a great Steakhouse...their favorite meal and our favorite bottle of wine! Darling Husband in his best caveman-like voice says, "These children WILL adapt to our lifestyle!" Thank you again to the brains within Apple Inc.
44. Catch and/or pick an entire meal and cook together! Check, Check, check, several times! I love summer cookin'!
45. Fly in a crop duster...this did not happen, but would be so exhilarating!
46. Make friendship bracelets! Or, buy them! Did both!
47. Make ribbon wands and dance outside to fun music! Very Cute!
48. Attempt to get "Call Me Maybe" permanently brainwashed out of my head!
49. Smile lots and whine (or wine) less...this was a goal for the whole family!
50. Make a photo book of the entire summer to cherish the memories and transfer those thoughts into the upcoming school year!

Until next summer!!


Dixie Chic